My Third Grader Analogy for Lens Reviews and Testing
I make a joke about this sometimes, but I think it’s more and more appropriate. Every day, I see more and more people take some single bit of data published on a lens and extrapolate the entire meaning of the photographic universe from that bit of data. My joke has always gone, “a single lens analysis is like measuring a third-grader and then publishing that third-graders are 157 cm tall.”

Almost every online resource gives you some useful information. At the same time, absolutely every resource only provides you part of the picture (pun intended). Oh, and that includes pictures (another pun intended). So without further ado, I will proceed to make fun of every type of online lens analysis, because they are interesting and fun, but really not worth getting so upset about.
Forum Comments:
My third grader isn’t very tall.
Mine is amazingly, awesomely tall. You must have a bad copy.
I think your tape measure isn’t lined up correctly.
Just take your third grader out to the park and stop measuring him. If you like the way he acts, you’ve got a good third grader.
Summarized Customer Review
139 people have commented on third-graders.
About 3 feet: 8%
Between 3 and 4 feet: 22%
Between 4 and 5 feet: 41%
Between 5 and 6 feet: 21%
Over 6 feet: 8%
Computer Target Analysis Testing 1
Our third grader is 153 cm tall at the head, 121 cm tall at the shoulder, 61 cm from waist to floor.
Computer Target Analysis Testing 2
Our third grader is 159 cm tall at the head, 128 cm tall at the shoulder, and 68 cm from waist to floor.
Computer Target Analysis Testing 3
Our third grader is 111 cm tall at the head and 115 cm tall at the shoulder, but we think his head may have been tilted.
Lensrentals
We measured 10 third graders and they are 3mm tall at the head and 2.7mm tall at the shoulder. Sample variation was unacceptably high, with a range +/- 0.18 mm. Remember our measurements are different because the third graders are at infinity when we measure them. And we aren’t certain if we calculated the sensor glass thickness correctly.

The Digital Picture
Here are pictures of third graders measured on our standard test pattern. You can use our comparison tool to see how they stack up against fourth, fifth or sixth graders.
Imaging Resource / SLRGear
Here is our cool graph of the size of third graders at all the various measurement differences. You can move the slider on the left to see how the proportions change as it grows. You can see that the larger head that is apparent at the start position smooths proportion nicely as time passes.

DPReview
Things we like:
- Funny most of the time.
- Very weather resistant, actually performs well in a downpour.
- Small and portable, easy to carry around.
- High levels of enthusiasm over almost everything.
Things we don’t like:
- Emotionally labile; difficult to reason with.
- Eats constantly.
- Short attention span, requires a lot of entertainment.
DxO
Third graders rate 82.4 on our child rating scale.
Photozone
Third graders have a beautiful, smooth out-of-focus blur as you can see from the multiple samples below. And since they’re constantly moving, this is important.
Lenstip
Here’s how much a third grader flares if you hold him up in direct sunlight, and over here is how distorted he looks in the corner.

Ken Rockwell
I’ve never actually had a third grader, but here’s what I think of them.
CameraLabs
Here are crops of the corners of third graders, compared to corner crops of fourth graders.
Steve Huff
Here are amazing pictures of third graders that will make you want one.

Way Too Many Sites
Hey, somebody else reviewed this lens and here’s a screaming controversial extremist headline that says they concluded something that actually they just sort of hinted might be possible.

</end sarcasm>
OK, I’ve had my fun for today. In a couple of days, I’ll put up a post sharing how I use online reviews and tests when I’m deciding about a lens. A subtle hint here; that means I read a lot of reviewers and testers because they are showing lots of things about lenses that my testing doesn’t show, but that I want to know about.
Roger Cicala
Lensrentals.com
2016
51 Comments
Hao Ye ·
LOL. Sick burns all the way around. Keep it up! 🙂
Mat ·
By any chance – do you know what Thom Hogan thinks about third-graders? I’m particularily interested whether it makes sense to take them to Botswana or Galapagos and who is making decisions in Japan for the future development of third-graders.
Roger Cicala ·
I knew I was forgetting someone 🙂
Lee ·
ROGER CICALA SAYS THOM HOGAN IS THE BEST AND LEAST PARODYABLE PHOTOGRAPHY COMMENTATOR
Christopher J. May ·
Thom has been urging for better communication with third graders for years and has repeatedly stated that they really should have a more thought out set of clothes (buzz buzz).
Mike Gordon ·
This made me snort coffee through my nose laughing. 🙂
Astro Landscapes ·
Thom Hogan:
Here’s my predictions of what third graders will do in 2017…
Here’s what I think third graders OUGHT to do in the next year or two…
Here’s why, despite all the terrible quality control and lack of apparent direction, I’ll continue favoring third graders…
bdbender4 ·
Recently released CIPA figures show that as fertility decreases in developed nations, the market for third graders continues to decline. Yet N***n, with their heads buried deep in sophisticated engineering, are not aware of this trend and proceed merrily on their way as always.
dragos ·
You can clearly see that he was right in his predictions from last year: second graders passed into third grade. He has strong sources in the industry.
Caerolle ·
Thom looks like one seriously grumpy dude (pic on SansMirror site, at least). I would not want to be his third grader. And I bet he would have a LOT of things that god did wrong with the design of third graders, and OMG, CONTINUES to do wrong, in spite of all his attempts at telling god how to do them THE RIGHT WAY!!!!!
kirbysdl ·
Great article! Perhaps you’re going for subtlety, but I’d suggest the word “all” to drive the point home: “A single lens analysis is like measuring a third-grader and then publishing that all third-graders are 157 cm tall.”
Also relevant: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Rnq1NpHdmw
curby.net ·
Great article! Perhaps you're going for subtlety, but I'd suggest the word "all" to drive the point home: "A single lens analysis is like measuring a third-grader and then publishing that all third-graders are 157 cm tall."
Also relevant: https://www.youtube.com/wat...
Carleton Foxx ·
You sir, are a genius.
Sean Setters ·
To be fair, we have taken a lot of pictures of third graders, and it can be interesting to see how they stack up against the third, fourth and fifth graders. Regardless of grade-level, there are definitely some sharp students out there. 🙂
Roger Cicala ·
Agree, Sean, but there is some sample variation, too. 🙂
Sean Setters ·
Absolutely correct.
J.M. Stearns ·
So awesome
Christopher J. May ·
And now I must explain to my co-workers why I’m rolling on the floor guffawing. Well done, Roger.
Paul Russell ·
If only having a lens with twice the measured performance meant your average photographer would get photographs twice as good (or should that be four times as good, squared and all that?..)
H. Jones Photo ·
Posts like this remind me why I’d never rent anywhere else. Always fantastic Roger.
cnccnc ·
FroKnowsPhoto: I’ve had enough of Ken Rockwell’s opinion on third graders! He has never seen a third grader, doesn’t know anything about third graders and is dangerous to the knowledge of raising third graders!
Ravi Bindra ·
VisualScienceLab: When Ben was a third grader, he was an Otus.
TheOnlinePhotograper: Dogs were never in third grade. At least Buttons not.
Leica Forum: Do they make an Apo 3gLux or do they only come in ‘crons?
APUG: They do best in Rodinol for 12 mins at 21C
Kristian Wannebo ·
So true!
And I have sadly seen enough examples of such overinterpretation even in science, sigh ..
The third grader you measured, eh.. photographed seems to have humor too.
Good for him!
Christopher J. May ·
Inquiring minds want to know if DigitalRev kicked their third grader down a set of stairs and then lit him on fire…
donpedro ·
The Camera Store TV
Chris: This third grader doesn’t have stabilization, so it’s a bit too twitchy for general use.
Jordan: This third grader breathes too much. If they could get this third grader to stop breathing as much, it’d be perfect.
Alexander Mosquera ·
Spot on!
Andy Seward ·
Matt Granger –
*points 3rd grader at semi-naked model
“It’s not bad folks”
obican ·
Sony Alpha Rumors: Third grader comes in Sony E-Mount!! (SR-5)
obican ·
Sony to release ninth grader (SR5)
obican ·
Roger from Lensrentals tested a third grader who has a Playstation made by Sony!
Carl Eberhart ·
Lensrentals has the nicest lens testing toys of them ALL though, do they not? It’s important to have a nice toy and know how to play with it. My nephews have taught me this over time. If you get bored with a toy, just buy another !!
Lee ·
This is gold.
obican ·
Photozone: Our first sample of thid grader had a decentering problem.
Eliana Cooper ·
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Florent ·
Ahahaha, awesome Roger, you just made my day 🙂
Les ·
We should see a whole new crop of third graders around the time Photokina starts in September. I wouldn’t get one right now.
James Thomson ·
Yes, the ones available now are all last years model. Wait for the new features and the reviews.
Mark Rustad ·
Lloyd Chamber’s is often sent to the Guidance Office with warnings never to rat out 3rd Grade pretenders again…not to mention charge for the carnage his deep thought generates.
Astro Landscapes ·
DigitalRev:
“Let’s spend the entire video talking about hot chicks and birth control, and at the end just casually mention that if we had to pick, we’d rather adopt a fully grown adult instead of a third grader.”
PetaPixel:
“Somewhere buried in this pile of disgusting clickbait trash is a highly un-qualified opinion about something vaguely related to photography, and absolutely zero worthwhile sample images or useful statements of fact.”
SLR Lounge:
“Third graders are like the Kardashian of youngsters. They sound like a great idea at first, and probably feel awesome in your hands, but at the end of the day you’ll hate yourself for spending that much money on one…”
FStoppers:
“I’m a landscape/portrait photographer, but let me tell you all about this piece of kit (that’s British for camera gear) that is a specialty tool mostly suited for portrait/landscape photography.”
FroKnowsPhoto:
“Sit back and relax while I take 49 minutes to deliver 49 seconds worth of useful information.”
Edna Bambrick ·
What!!!??? Nobody compared the 3rd grader to the Otus? What is this world coming to?
grm070 ·
Kelby: I took my new Third Grader to the sidelines of the Panthers game, and I found a really neat trick you can do if you simultaneously hold his nose while pressing his belly button.
bdbender4 ·
Why didn’t you mention what hammers a third grader should use? Given the proclivity to smack their fingers, a 12oz would be best to start with. Only later should they progress to a 16oz, and there is really no need for 20oz unless you are a professional framer.
Roger Cicala ·
You are one of the few who remember my favorite blog post ever 🙂
l_d_allan ·
Would that be:
https://www.lensrentals.com/blog/2012/03/hammerforum-com/
Michael Clark ·
Many of us remember it! But I like the coat hanger one better.
Caerolle ·
I keep thinking of the hour-long video the Northrups would make…but I won’t go there.
Mike Gordon ·
Awesome!
banpreso ·
DigitalRev: this third grader did not survive soccer ball kick to the head, did not survive falling down stairs, and did not survive being lit on fire. better spend your money on a Gitzo.
Lensrental: watch us open up and dissect this third grader and see what makes him tick. don’t worry, we won’t loose any parts and will put him through the optic bench before letting him go back to school.
Fredmiranda: third grader shows unacceptable corner smear on my A7, i need the sensor stack modification.
ebay: buy it now $3,000 (28 watching)
David Wegiel Jr ·
We don’t want to see FroKnowsPhoto do the sniff test of the third grader
dslr pundit ·
Quite a post, with so many review websites it gets frustrated to be able to find dslr photography info we need. I personally haven’t been a fan of digitalrev ever.
http://www.dslrpundit.com
Anal sex ·
There was no telling what thoughts would come from the machine.